Don’t take it personally..

…but this ad is personal.

You’re the only person to see it. It will make the product familiar to only you. Nobody else will have heard about the product or know how much it costs or what its benefits are. It won’t say much about you because its unique qualities have not been made public. And don’t take it personally, but you’ll have little assurance that it will perform as we claim since you don’t know anyone else who uses it.

Don’t take it personally but this ad costs about 6 cents to run. It took no creative talent to conjure up. It has no contextual relevance to the content you are trying to enjoy. DO take us seriously, but please, don’t take it personally that your browsing experience is frustrated by our ad which has abused your data plan, your battery and your privacy.

We know ALL about you. We know your likes, your tastes, proclivities, hobbies, political stance, age, sex, and religion too. We did not ask you for this information, we just took it…but please, don’t take it personally; it’s in your best interests. Our methods and manners aside, what is paramount is that you receive the right ad at the right time in the right place.

Don’t take it personally but I am an AI machine, cold and lifeless. Although my stated mission is to pair the perfect product or service to the consumer minds behind the billions of eyeballs stuck to my digital tentacles, I am really just a mindless drone whose master is marketing.

Don’t take it personally, but this ad is JUST for YOU.